Warning: DANGER AHEAD

Dear Whole Entire Extended Family,
You are all on notice. I will NOT put up with this crap you're dishing out to me. And this most recent situation has turned into a catastrophic attempt at a family gathering. I understand that it's Crazy Politically Stupid Obsessed Woman's birthday brunch because she's getting ancient, and that's al very noble, really. But you did a VERY shitty job of planning and coordinating around the needs and SCHEDULES of ALL the members of this family. All of you have impressed upon me/us how you really wanna see my kids. However, all of your actions are screaming that you only care about what's good and convenient for yourselves instead of taking into consideration the fact that there are two very small people living by and thriving on a strict schedule. So, contradict your claims and words with all your actions. Then, don't act so damn surprised at my reaction/response to it all when I tell you that you don't be seeing my babies. You didn't think about them in planning, so why should you think about them later on when you are NOT seeing them. And don't even bother bitching at me for it. I don't wanna hear about it. I'm the mom in this situation. My kids are far more important to me than they are to you and your plans regarding family-related events now. You really wanna see them, then you can work around their schedule to see them. They're too little to have to continually bend to the wills of all the other people in their lives. If they're important enough for you to babble about wanting me to arrange a chance for you to see them, then you can skip a "normal" day in your life for it to get worked out. Make it happen and I'll work with you.
Until then, I fully reserve the right to keep my children completely away from any and every single jerkoff who can't put them first on their list of priorities. You're all on the shit list, to begin with, and the short list for being denied visitation. Because I'm the mom, and I just said so.